By: Vivian Leduc
If beauty is deemed the most important factor in determining personal worth in this culture, what is in second place?
It is intelligence as expressed in scholastic aptitude. When the bearing of a firstborn child is approaching, his parents pray that he will be normal-- that is, "average." But from that moment on, average will simply not suffice. These parents’ child must excel. He must succeed. He must triumph. He must be the first of his age to talk or walk or ride a bicycle. He must earn a perfect report card and amaze his teachers with his wit and wisdom. He must do well in Little League, and later he must be a track star or the valedictorian of his senior class. His sister must be a cheerleader or the senior-class president or the best pupil in her advanced-placement class.
If beauty is deemed the most important factor in determining personal worth in this culture, what is in second place?
It is intelligence as expressed in scholastic aptitude. When the bearing of a firstborn child is approaching, his parents pray that he will be normal-- that is, "average." But from that moment on, average will simply not suffice. These parents’ child must excel. He must succeed. He must triumph. He must be the first of his age to talk or walk or ride a bicycle. He must earn a perfect report card and amaze his teachers with his wit and wisdom. He must do well in Little League, and later he must be a track star or the valedictorian of his senior class. His sister must be a cheerleader or the senior-class president or the best pupil in her advanced-placement class.
Throughout the formative years of adolescence, parents send their kids the same message day after day: "We're counting on you to do something great. Now don't disappoint us!" The hopes, dreams, and ambitions of an entire family sometimes rest on the shoulders of an immature child. And in this atmosphere of fierce competition, the parent who produces an intellectually gifted child is clearly holding the winning sweepstakes ticket.
Unfortunately, exceptional children are just that--exceptions. Seldom does a five-year-old memorize the the Bible or play chess blindfolded or compose symphonies in the Beethoven manner. On the contrary, the vast majority of our children are not dazzlingly brilliant, extremely witty, highly coordinated, universally talented, or tremendously popular. They are just plain kids with oversized needs to be loved and accepted as they are. Thus, the stage is set for unrealistic pressure on the younger generation and considerable disappointment for their parents.
“I feel like getting an education is extremely important, but I honestly think that it's more on the side of passing and getting good grades since the standard is being set higher and higher,” says Bolsa student Katelyn Vinh. “This results in the students feeling a lot more pressure and anxiety about the stability of their future when they really should be enjoying learning and school.”
So parents, instead of pressuring your kids, watch your kids closely in order to have a realistic view of their potential and strengths. Then, encourage your kids to give their very best effort; too often, parental expectations are based in achievement as opposed to effort. Try to live life in the moment. Read books, visit museums, and take classes together because they enjoy learning, rather than focusing on grades. Throw a ball around for the joy of it, not because you want to mold the next NFL superstar.
You may now wonder, what then is the key to leading students to success without the strains of pressure constantly present on their shoulders? Coming from a student, the key to living a fulfilled life is to do just that--live.
Unfortunately, exceptional children are just that--exceptions. Seldom does a five-year-old memorize the the Bible or play chess blindfolded or compose symphonies in the Beethoven manner. On the contrary, the vast majority of our children are not dazzlingly brilliant, extremely witty, highly coordinated, universally talented, or tremendously popular. They are just plain kids with oversized needs to be loved and accepted as they are. Thus, the stage is set for unrealistic pressure on the younger generation and considerable disappointment for their parents.
“I feel like getting an education is extremely important, but I honestly think that it's more on the side of passing and getting good grades since the standard is being set higher and higher,” says Bolsa student Katelyn Vinh. “This results in the students feeling a lot more pressure and anxiety about the stability of their future when they really should be enjoying learning and school.”
So parents, instead of pressuring your kids, watch your kids closely in order to have a realistic view of their potential and strengths. Then, encourage your kids to give their very best effort; too often, parental expectations are based in achievement as opposed to effort. Try to live life in the moment. Read books, visit museums, and take classes together because they enjoy learning, rather than focusing on grades. Throw a ball around for the joy of it, not because you want to mold the next NFL superstar.
You may now wonder, what then is the key to leading students to success without the strains of pressure constantly present on their shoulders? Coming from a student, the key to living a fulfilled life is to do just that--live.